Day 8 / Day 9

It’s 4:15am. I have to get up in 75 minutes.

I can’t sleep.

Yesterday He and i, we talked aboit how i haven’t fallen asleep in a mans arms for ages. But the real sad thing is that i can’t even sleep in the same bed with my boyfriend. Okay i know, it’s my fault as well – i fall asleep really hard and can wake up to literally the smallest noise… it wasn’t aleways like that. When i was younger i was okay, then in a bad moment a started to use xanax and it fucked up everything. Although it was more than 10 years ago, i can’t really sleep well since then. 

Regardless… i feel like crying… i just want to be held… a good night sleep next to a man. 

Next to Him…